Pre-Lingual Meditation?

Discussion in 'General discussion' started by deafAncient, May 18, 2015.

  1. deafAncient

    deafAncient New Member

    Namaskāra to all,

    I remember as a kid, being deaf and undiagnosed at the time, I had a habit of humming a repetitive pattern (the pattern being the modulation, or up-down pattern of the pitch) only in the vowel of "uh," as in अ or in the palatal consonant of ñ, as in ञ. In the latter, I would hold my tongue in the palatal position and hum the cyclical pitch pattern, depending on what I was thinking of. I did the palatal mode because I couldn't hear and found by accident that holding the tongue there causes the resonance to shift into the nasal cavity, amplifying the humming, putting it closer to my brain(?) so I could feel it even more strongly.

    It had an effect on me, and I tended to use this humming to focus on some attribute of a person I liked (this, I started "meditating" on the person after I learned to speak and thusly could understand what a person was like beyond the mere smile and the apparent attention given to me through contact, smiling, and doing something with me (playing with toys, getting me to play with him or her, or something about a character that I admired). I did this until my early 30s, when I supposedly believed that I "outgrew" this practice.

    Fast forward 9 years later... For years, I had been fascinated with didgeridoo music, as I was first exposed to it via Yothu Yindi in the early 90s. Over 3 years ago, I decided to learn to play didgeridoo. BOOM, I accidentally returned to my old habit of humming as described, only that I didn't hum, but played various patterns on the didge.

    The modulation on a didge, instead of it being pitch-based, is instead overtone-based. This means that the overtones being used would be (while blowing through the didge like you would a tuba) to use your mouth to form vowel-producing shapes like uh-ee-uh-ee. One overtone is "ah," another one is "oh," and so on. An overtone vocally is a vowel, and you change that with your pronunciation process. You form overtone patterns, like the first one being held evenly, equal amount of time given to each overtone, "uh-ee-uh-ee-uh-ee-uh-ee..." over and over until you run out of breath and repeat. Another thing you can do is adjust the speed of the overtone modulation, and yet another is putting stress emphasis on some part of the pattern to give it some variety and a different feel. Like, "oh-EE-oh-ee-oh-EE-oh-ee..." (The beat is actually on EE, and the first "oh" is really a pick-up note before you hit the first downbeat) There are many different ways you can do this.

    I have several different rhythms apart from the above, and all of these have a different effect, which causes me to meditate on different people because they have characteristics I like, or ones that just plain makes me stop and take notice for some unknown reason. I often do this without the didge while sitting at the computer, especially when I am putting together one of the online jigsaw puzzles of say, a mūrti display, a photo of a Holi parade or Gānapatya procession in the streets when I want to get away from reading for a while.

    I suppose this is my form of "Aum" meditation because it is pre-lingual, pre-social, and especially pre-religion. Although my state of mind is normally silent, it is GUARANTEED that as long as I'm not looking at text of any kind (because that triggers the inner voice, which is how I understand what I read), my mind stays silent and won't allow spontaneous inner voice generation (it is very difficult to "hear" clearly the inner voice while doing this). However, I have done this while reading contemporary books on Sanātana Dharma (I mean, books ABOUT SD, as opposed to actual scripture or sacred writings, like "Dharma: the Global Ethic" or "Science of the Sacred"). I am somewhat familiar with Bhagavad Gītā, so I have done this practice while thinking of the video footage of Arjuna or Kṛṣṇa speaking to each other (I mean, from the video of this epic as opposed to the sacred images or mūrtis). This latter example creates a different impact, as though I can "feel" the character I am reading about, or a concept, such as Indian astronomy 5000-6000 years ago. I do this for hours and hours at home or even on the road.

    I have been thinking about this, and while reading one of my contemporary books on Brahman this morning, it occurred to me that I've been wondering for a while if this "Aum" is a kind of memory-retrieval or spiritual-connection device.

    I would like to know if anyone has had experience with this or have known of individuals with this practice. I have never tried to ask about this before, as it was something I would never share with anyone, but have decided now because I feel there is a potential connection to meditation, and I may have been doing it in an altered state most of my life.

  2. Dhavalyash das

    Dhavalyash das Moderator Staff Member

    Pranam ...Wonderful experience you have shared here, the power that you gained from the Universe are waves and frequencies which you tuned with your kundalini powers same like those of Radios and Television.

    Aum is the mool/root mantra, this word is the reason for creation and so the most powerful. The vibration that we hear from AUM is only limited towards our ears but the frequencies can reach our mind, soul, heart & our third eye. We got our 18 Purans, Vedic History, 108 Upanishads, 4 Veds, Smriti etc.....all these were been written by sages how? The words, teachings, images are already present within our COSMO, like the words and images are traveling form one place to another however we need a radio kind of a device to hear it and a television kind of a device to see it, even such material device can capture things easily and so our sages with the power of meditation, matched the frequency of their mind with the frequency of this Universe and compiled scriptures. Like Sage vedvyasji entered the battle field and saw everything happening and compiled The was only possible because those words and images remains within our Universe for billions of years and all we got to do is match the frequency of ours with the Universe VISHUDHI chakra. Those fights in the battle field of Kurushetra, kidnaping of Mata Sita, Avatars of Vishnu etc are still floating within our Universe with their voices and can still be seen or hear with similar powers which you just shared.

    Here when you said you feel the character when you read Gita, the kundalini powers within you, the power of Visualization which is known as the Agya chakra/the third eye or the Pinel Gland & the power of words which is the Vishudhi chakra or the Epiglotus get activated and so you can go beyond the reach of this Material world. You enter the state of Turia in which you are awake but also in a dream state. Such power can make you discover things which a human mind cannot.

    Every soul on this Planet are the same age of the Creator Brahma who is presently at the age of 51 and one day after his birthday. His 24 hours = 1000 x 2 times Chaturyuga, One Chaturyuga = 43,20,000 years which means his 12 hours are 4,32,00,00,000 Earth Years. Even the Scientist has accepted this Vedic fact, because this defines the age of this Universe, according you can calculate the age of this Universe and the age of our soul present within this same Universe traveling form one specie to another equals to the age of Brahmaji, as there are 84,00,000 species we traveled form every specie and atlast recd a birth in a human body, which keeps reincarnating depending on our karmas and desires at the time of death. So our Jivaatma or the Minute mind remembers many of our past birth however powers are needed to unlock those 7 secret doors present within our body. It seems you had access towards one or two door within you. You should seek help from a Scholar to move more ahead in this path of Spirituality.

    Teachings of my gurus and acharyas
    ||HaRe KriShnA||
  3. Dhavalyash das

    Dhavalyash das Moderator Staff Member

    The Experience that you had from the sound of didgeridoo, you can have the same from the conshell or the Vedic Mridanga, Brass Kartal, Brass bell....didgeridoo and such type of instrument creates vibration which a common man can hear only till their ears but many can feel the frequency and hertz within the soul. Hearing the sound of our own heart beats is the most beautiful of all the sounds in this world.

    After replying I was going through your profile and found out you do not have the ability to hear....this cleared my doubt, when a person meditates with closed eyes there needs to be a path from where things are been seen and so the third eye is nearby, the third eye gets activated and one can see past and future....same way when a person cannot hear physically has the ability to hear form within, the hertz are felt much better in this case. Respect......It seems your past life ability and practice were incomplete ....hope it does get fulfilled in this life, hope you achieve whats best for you.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 18, 2015
  4. deafAncient

    deafAncient New Member

    Namaskāra Dhavalyash...

    It's a surprise, to read this from you. You are the first person ever to read this very personal thing about myself and reply to what I had to say. I was not expecting the kind of validation I got from you. This leaves me emotional. I saw this in the morning, but didn't reply, as I had to take it in while doing things to get ready for another weekend at faire. It seems to be that SD is the ONLY place where it would make sense to divulge this personal attribute about me. I have done this on the didge in front of people, but never explained why, and always incorporated it with other rhythms I was doing, to not draw attention to it.

    I'm not yet familiar with a lot of what you said, like kundalinī, Vishudhi cakra, Agya cakra, or Turia. Again, this is something I have done most of my life, in complete isolation, as I was too embarrassed to try to even ask a counselor or find it online to see if I had some "developmental problem," as I was caught by my stepmother as a teenager and berated for being immature and making baby noises. Imagine how that feels... But I could not stop doing it. It was only in the last two years of didge playing that I began to realize what it is. And then it was only in the past several months before I realized that there might be a connection. Now, you confirmed it for me.

    What is really emotional about it is that it feels like it's a homing device for me. I want to go home. I'm searching for something. There is somebody I miss, some life or consciousness that I miss. It is a huge longing...

    I need to make a correction about your perception about my deafness. I do have a very small amount of residual hearing that is greatly supported by my hearing aids (without which, much of my world does not exist). I am classically trained as a musician and have toured western Europe (1980s), and I played in various music activities in school. I speak clearly, yet you can tell that I have a deaf "accent." For some reason, I have better accent imitation skills than the average hearing person. When I use words in español, I use the accent that is used by Hispanic people of Native American blood, because they are who I grew up around. If I were to speak words in Saṃskṛtam, it would probably have that accent to it because of my background. The reason I picked the didge is because it is the only instrument other than the tuba and the drums in which I can play and "hear" within without my hearing aids. I can even vocalize in the octave intervals above the note of the didge, and then vocalize a fourth or a fifth above the octave note in my register for a different sound. I can also focus on a discordant note just below the fourth to give it yet another feel. I like to use this as a two-pitch car horn and make a rhythm with it. Anything above a tuba, pitch-wise, makes it hard for me to feel anything and becomes unintelligible by feel alone.

    Another thing is that I created my own language over 30 years ago, using the concept of an abugida, of which Saṃskṛtam and Hindi, among other south Asian languages are based on, and using a ciphering method to create vocabulary, even though I was not exposed to such concepts in the small town I lived in while growing up. I have to wonder how I knew about this. If you look at my avatar, that is what my writing system looks like. It's called Galeh Yuvo, which means "To (simply) be." This language is a spiritual, sacred language for me.

    My question for you is, how do I go about finding a scholar/teacher who will be able to understand all that I have told and help me go further?

    Praṇāma and Galeh Yuvo
  5. Dhavalyash das

    Dhavalyash das Moderator Staff Member

    Namaskar, Hare Krishna __/\__

    As I said earlier when thoughts are similar the Frequency meets and so the universe made Internet a medium to link us with each other.

    Kundalini and chakras are part of one talks about the 7 chakras in a human body for eg. lets talk about Vishudhi chakra. When thich chakra or the Pitutary gland is balanced in our body our mind thinks logically, it has the power to think something beyond our education skills or something which nobody told us but we can still make out. If this chakra is under balanced the person stammers a lot, many other such problems while speaking and if this chakra is over balanced, such kind of person are irritating, they speaks a lot which is disliked by most of us, they talk more of nonsense. Sameway there are 7 chakras within our body which are part of our Glands, it can either be balanced, under balanced of over balanced. From your words I can make out that your Vishudhi chakra might be balanced, do you get logics solved easily or easily get logical thoughts, you might be speaking very less and up to the point whenever required? Creating a language of your own is also related to intellegence and vishudhi chakra.

    There are few people in this world whose single chakra is balanced and very very rare to find someone with all chakra balanced. When they are balanced the 2 energies known as IDA and PINGLA or the YIN/YAN or the Kundalini rises and sends waves which meets the frequency of this Universe and opens many secrets within us For eg. in present people are more towards lust, this is linked with the Swadhishthan chakra. When the chakra is overbalanced the person becomes lusty and underbalanced can make them impotent and if it is balanced the person can easily control his/her sense of lust so similar way all our glands/chakras work.

    How to find a teacher? in our Sanatan Teachings it is always the GURU who finds someone and makes him his Disciple. I have no specif answer to this question of yours however Internet is one of the best medium & I am sure you would find someone, I am a follower of BHAKTI YOGA and not much in to Yogic kriyas however yogic kriyas are also part of Bhakti yoga but the yogic skills you got is more linked with Dhyan yog/Medetation. If you use your skills to develop love for Sri Ram, Sri Krishna then you would get all your answers within Gita. Shriamd Bhagwad Gita has the power, ask a question to yourself medetating towards the lotus feets of Krishna and open a Random page of Gita and there would be your hidden answer.

    2 people like this.
  6. deafAncient

    deafAncient New Member


    I did it... I think I did it!

    I'm reading the paper, "Jñāna Yoga," by Swami Vivekānanda, where he states that everything has a cycle, from the seed of the tree, to a plant pushing its way up, and finally into a tree, before it releases a seed, dies, and goes completely back into the ground as the new seed repeats the process, as well as for the water vapour that comes to a river as rain, is carried down as river water, and reaches the ocean before it is evaporated again. At that moment I read these paragraphs, something dawned on me.

    I believe that subconsciously, I do the overtone cycling as described above because it is a reflection of the cycle of life, going from "ah-o-ah-ee-ah-o-ah-ee," and so on, endlessly. Something tells me that this is how my world is sustained, through the endless cycling of the material world.

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  7. deafAncient

    deafAncient New Member

    There is more to the story. Recently, I started working with someone who has had experience under a spiritual master. He was recommended to me by the temple manager. I explained to him that my varṇāśramadharma was destroyed (not working, lost as to what I really want to do, and struggling to keep going monetarily), and I wanted to advance myself spiritually. He said that I had progressed to the point I was ready for Vānaprastha stage of life, and that I am considerably advanced.

    He said that I was put in this body to work something out in my life, hence my deafness. He sensed that I was advanced in using a sound technique, and maybe I used it wrong, like there was a misalignment, and it didn’t work. I got angry at the world and built up saṃskāra around it. What he had me do, which I am familiar with from past work under a different system, is “relive and release.” This is a technique of finding something in your life that gives you emotions, like fear and grief. With your eyes closed, you focus on that and let the emotions come. The important thing is not to just “remember,” but to relive that moment, when you were that 8-year-old child or a new 24-year-old widow. You do that seven times in the session. Try to stay on that one incident, or if it stops giving you the emotions, find the next incident that does it, and continue on with it. After this, just sit back and relax (remember to breathe). This is what I’m doing now.

    I had a vision this morning, where (with my eyes closed) I could see a wall around me, like a ball. The wall is rough, with cracks and fissures in it. I knew that my technique of playing didgeridoo and even the use of my lips only, as though I was playing an invisible didgeridoo, was important for some reason. For a long time, it’s felt like a “homing device” of some kind. And I had an idea. I approached one of the cracks in the saṃskāra, and my Self filled in every split of the crack and “became the coating” of the crack, and I started the use of my lips and played not a percussive rhythm or pattern, but a particular sustained oscillation tremolo. As soon as I did that, the subtle material would start to shake and break apart from the wall, and it would be floating in the space around me.

    Anyway, I would do it long enough that I could break through the samśkāra, and I would see light outside! Apparently, I know to continue the lip tremolo SEPARATE from the wall, and the light from outside reaches in, grabs me, and yanks me through the hole into the light, and I am there within this small amount of light for maybe 20 seconds, and suddenly I’m pulled back inside the ball of saṃskāra, and I can’t go back out to it. I pick another crack in the saṃskāra wall, and repeat the process. There are places where it’s so thick that I have to lip tremolo two or three times to break through to the light.

    Sometimes, after I’ve made the hole and light shines through it, my tears start flowing and eventually subside, and sometimes, the light outside reaches in and yanks me out of the ball of saṃskāra, and my tears start flowing as I see myself in this light, and then I get pulled back inside this ball.

    Now, I’m back inside this ball, and I continue this process. I learned that as I work on a thick section of the wall, when the lip tremolo breaks up the wall, I can expand and push outward to keep the feed rate constant, and as I break though the wall, I can then redirect the energy of the technique outward, away from the center (since there is no wall there anymore) towards the ringed edge of the new hole, and keep going, expanding the size of the hole, but only to a certain point before it becomes too weak to further expand the hole. I have a choice of either making another hole nearby and expanding to connect with the hole next to it, or like a welder cutting a hole bigger, work on the edge of the hole and go around the edge of the hole, breaking the material up. It would be like peeling an apple from top to bottom in a spiral; eventually, the skin of the apple is gone.

    I will say at this point that four or five years ago, I had discovered a technique of dealing with unease, and just now realized that I’ve forgotten about it about 3-4 months after I discovered it. I close my eyes to see “nothing around me.” Suddenly, something relatively dark or concentrated (not a color, but something within the subtle world) approaches me. I know to approach it, acknowledge it, embrace it, and experience the emotions before accepting it fully. I go on, floating in this “nothingness,” and wait for the next thing, and repeat the process several times until I couldn’t sense more. There was some sort of sphere I was in, centered within me, but large enough to keep me from being able to reach outside of it with my hands or feet. I could see that it would gradually, JUST gradually lighten up as I did this work during those 3-4 months. Really, it was just going from a shade of black to a lighter shade of black, if that makes sense.

    In the first few days since meeting with this man from the temple this past Sunday, I have done the relive and release technique every morning, and it has helped. This morning is when I began to see the ball-wall of saṃskāra and stumbled upon the “ultrasonic” technique of lip tremolo. Apparently, these first few sessions since Sunday removed enough of the saṃskāra to enable me to see more clearly what this sphere I started seeing four or five years ago was.

    Now, this technique seems to leave debris from the saṃskāra ball-wall, and it’s floating around me. I am apparently able to redirect the “intent” of the lip tremolo such that the light outside doesn’t try to reach in and pull me back out, but instead becomes some kind of attractive force for the debris to start moving towards my center. As these pieces contact the Self (or ānandamayakosha???), these pieces turn to light that is more intense than the light I have at the time, VERY intense light, before being reabsorbed back into my center. The more I do it, the faster the pieces move towards me. Currently, the space inside the ball-wall is fairly thick with this broken wall material, that I need to pull it towards me to reconvert back to light and expand myself outward as the pieces come to me. I seem to have enough strength to vibrate the whole ball-wall, and because of the relative weakness of the lip tremolo being spread across a large area rather than focused on a spot, very fine pieces come off, and they seem less “disruptive,” or less intense as they return to light upon contact and are reabsorbed into my Self. So now, the technique can be varied so that I can either only attract material to me to be reabsorbed, or I can vibrate the ball-wall to break the material down, or I can do both at the same time. I have to wonder which technique is faster, this technique, or the “spiral peeling of the apple?” The outer layers of the saṃskāra ball-wall has the far more intense light potential upon reconversion, and I think that I can regain more of the energy of my Self faster than I would if I were absorbing a less-intense amount of energy from the inner layers of the ball-wall, and the more of the light I can see the further I expand the hole to the outside. Eventually, as the process of opening the hole passes the “equator” of the ball-wall, it then changes to a process of reducing the size of this now-bowl.

    A note of something about the nature of the light from this broken-up material that is remanifest as it contacts my Self… Regardless of the intensity of the light of my Self, the pieces that are remanifest back into myself are always brighter than my Self. It might be because something went wrong, and I became angry, and I hurled this energy outward to create this wall of separation (turning away from the world). The more I did it, though, the weaker I became, and the weaker in intensity the energy I flung outward. The inner surface doesn’t have much light upon reconversion, but the further out towards the outer surface I go, the brighter the light reconversion process becomes over time, but the light is always brighter than my Self is, and the Self is brighter than it was some time ago. I do not know how thick this saṃskāra is (though I can see it at the edge if using the “peel the apple” technique, and the thickness varies), apparently, but I will know when I have broken up the whole of saṃskāra and can rejoin with the light I have been able to see outside through those holes.

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